Etcetera 16.

Water! At the square root of sports is water.

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Squirt water on the boxer’s head between rounds. Squirt the water all over his jaws.

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The windows of the race car are covered in water.

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There is no running water in the marathoner’s shack.

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The horse has a fraught relationship with water; the jockey is careful at the bath.

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When the ice rink melts that is bad water, water no one can use.

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A bottle of water will cost you anywhere between 35 cents and 3 dollars in this county.

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A basketball player sprays water at one of his opponents and the flagrant foul is called.

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The water in the bay is filthy, unfit for a proper boat race.

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A baseball that was steeped in boiling water has no place in the Major Leagues.

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The coach deprived his team of water in an effort to toughen them up. It turned out to be a tremendous mistake.

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We are completely out of water. The fields are brown.

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The fly fisher stares at the water, and he stares at it some more.

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If you leave your weights in the water much longer they will get rusty.

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The wrestler got so full of water that he fainted on the mat.

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“Waiter?” said the caddy. “One more water.”

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Before he goes to sleep, the pole-vaulter enjoys a small glass of scotch and water.

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Football is like warm water. It may start up again soon.

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Water polo? Why sure.

Written By

Joshua Baldwin is an editor at Eephus. He is the author of The Wilshire Sun, a novella. His writing has appeared in The Paris Review, n+1, The Brooklyn Rail, Chicago Review, Prelude, and elsewhere. He lives in Los Angeles. Reach him at josh@eephusmag.com.

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